All-New Invaders 5, Fantastic Four 5

All-New Invaders 5
J. Robinson (w) and Pugh (a) and Guru eFX (c) and Petit (l)

Everything works out because Winter Soldier breaks out Aarkus and he and another Eternal find the God's Whisper while Torch knocks out the watching Kree soldiers and Steve uses a computer virus laced shield (??) to shut down the Supremor for a time while they make their way off-planet. Back on Earth, Namor returns to the deep, Bucky goes back to wherever it is Bucky goes, and Cap recruits Jim to SHIELD while they muse over what Aarkus could be doing with the Eternals (hint: controlling Galactus in the Negative Zone with the God's Whisper if they should ever need him).

That "everything works out" bit above is only there partly because I'm lazy. Moreover, though, it's there because that's the spirit of this issue. It's very much a book that revolves around the old school style "I only wanted you to THINK I'd missed when, in fact, I was aiming at that device above you that's currently toppling on you" or some such that I swear happened in every other issue of AVENGERS back near the start of its run. Here it's all meaningless misdirect as Bucky buys time, Cap has a computer virus on his shield (not how that works, for the record, don't care what kind of comic book technology you have), and Torch ups the radiation in the room with Cap waving it off by literally saying "I'm immune." If the solutions are ridiculous then the stakes are meaningless. It's like being in an imaginary shootout with a child who keeps saying "no, you didn't hit me! I have a forcefield and the shot bounced and hit you!" You can make up the rules all you want, that doesn't mean I'm going to be on board with it. Pugh's art is pretty good though.

Total Score: 2/5


Fantastic Four 5
J. Robinson (w) and Kirk (p) and Leisten and Magyar (i) and Aburtov (c) and Cowles (l)

The Fantastic Four are on trial and the prosecutor is dragging them through the mud about every major superhero thing they've played a role in and how many people it hurt and it ends with a ruling that we don't get the full sense of yet but means the kids of the FF are shipped off to Camp Hammond to be watched by new SHIELD agent Jim Hammond (very quickly making his first SHIELD appearance from above). Oh, and in other news on this book, it made me as angry as any other book I've read in the past year and a half and I can't believe Marvel decided to charge five dollars for a book with five extra pages in it (albeit with art from all sorts of different artists).

Seriously. The courtroom superhero drama hasn't been compelling since the first time it was done and, when it's done this poorly, it throws everything into question. There's a writing trick wherein a writer knows exactly how a sane character would get out of a problem but dutifully ignores that solution because there's no drama in it. That's what Robinson's doing but it's not just Robinson who knows how to get out of it, it's every single person reading this book ever. The prosecutor has the shakiest grasp on how to prosecute and his terribleness and the terribleness of the entire plot draws the lawyering abilities of She-Hulk, the F4's lawyer, into severe question. It's a rare book that can take a completely separate book that I really like (SHE-HULK) and call it into question by painting its protagonist so weak. It's choppy writing at best and it's a terrible and cliche story that's executed about as badly as it could be. It feels like it was an excuse to get a bunch of guest artists in (who all do admirable work, though it sometimes feels like it's Marvel trying to hard sell their other books as Samnee draws some Daredevil related business and the Allred's pop in to draw Galactus and the Silver Surfer) and to charge an extra dollar for five extra pages and the book is garbage. Literally within the first three pages I was angry at this book.

Total Score: 1/5