Cataclysm - The Ultimates' Last Stand 1, Daredevil Dark Nights 6, Fantomex MAX 2

Cataclysm - The Ultimates' Last Stand 1
Bendis (w) and Bagley and Hennessy (a) and Keith (c)

Galactus is in the Ultimates Universe and he's ready to eat some worlds up, specifically Ultimate Earth. He shows up and Miles Morales is the first one on the scene, wondering what he can possibly do against the behemoth standing over the world. Fortunately, it's not long before the other Ultimates show up but, unfortunately, it's after Galactus blows up a sizable portion of New Jersey. Iron Man's readings on Galactus reveal that he's come from the 616 and Tony has legitimately no idea how to stop him, particularly as the combined might of their heroes seems to weigh not at all on Galactus. Tough fight incoming for the Ultimates and the rest of the world.

Not too much to this issue but pretty much exactly what there needed to be. We don't get a ton of character or depth of plot or anything like that; what we get is the immensity of the threat Galactus presents and the impact that the Ultimates, this Earth's greatest superhero team, has on them. It's a very worrying prospect for the universe and for the team and, though there's not much else to say about what happened in the issue, the threat speaks volumes. I think that CATACLYSM 0.1 last week was a better issue for characterization and the theoretical threat Galactus poses to the Ultimate Universe, exploring the idea in the differences between the 1610 and the 616 and how difficult it's always been for the 616 to stave off Galactus while highlighting just how much better equipped they've always been to deal with it. This issue is important, then, for showing the physical threat of Galactus. No more theoretical, no more "oh geez, this could go badly;" this issue needs to show "oh geez, this is going really badly." I think it accomplishes that pretty well. We'll see where the event goes from here.

Daredevil Dark Nights 6
Palmiotti (w) and Silas and Decastro (a) and Fabela (c)

Matt, alongside a random FBI agent named Keller, is escorting witness Nestor Canosa, a New York dishwasher who happened to see known drug lord Oscar Gomez stab popular DJ Brian Adams in a back alley, to Miami to testify against Gomez. We'll get back to this ridiculous summary sentence in the analysis just...just keep in mind how convoluted it sounds, even in the writing of it (sorry). When the group lands, they stop off at their hotel where Matt finds New York superhero friend Misty Knight lounging by the pool. They don't have a ton of time to catch up (though the sheer volume of words might make you think differently) as Agent Keller crashes out of a window and into the pool. He surfaces to tell Matt that Canosa is under attack. Matt and Misty run up to find a couple of attackers in the hotel room. Matt, now costumed, sends Canosa out of the room where Keller picks him up to try to protect him. However, the two separate groups are swarmed by backup and Keller is shot repeatedly, leaving the men no resistance in taking Canosa. Matt and Misty continue their investigation and track the kidnappers by their getaway car, crashing the party and finding out that Canosa is already gone, possibly still alive.

Jimmy Palmiotti has been around for awhile but I mostly know him as an inker. He's been on plenty of good books and he frequently worked alongside Joe Quesada, most notably (for me) on Quesada's artistic run on DAREDEVIL. I haven't seen a ton of his writing work; really my only experience with it is this year's WHAT IF...AVX. Between that and this first issue of Palmiotti's three on DAREDEVIL DARK NIGHTS, I think it's safe to say he is a pretty awful writer. I'm not thrilled with the story, which is both cliché and overly convoluted, but it's his exposition and his dialogue that are real killers. My first sentence in my summary paragraph was actually not far off from what's written, though it's about 15 sentences shorter. It's an incredibly slow book, one that really should be over by word count maybe ten pages in, again, particularly when the story is so cliché. Even THAT doesn't really cover it, though, as the writing is simply awkward. There's a distinct lack of, and I know this is going to sound weird and petty, contractions and it throws off every line of dialogue. Contractions are really something that you don't notice until they're not there. The phrasing of every contraction-lacking line suddenly becomes remarkably robotic and stiff which then, in turn, makes the would-be more natural lines sound out of place. It's just a mess. And I'm not particularly a fan of the art, to make matters worse. It's a little upsetting, assuming this trend will continue (and I'm willing to make that assumption after similarities between this and the writing of WHAT IF...AVX), that this arc will end what has been, in the least, an enjoyable Daredevil series.

Fantomex MAX 2
Hope (w) and Crystal (a) and Loughridge (c)

I changed my mind, I don't want to review this one, you guys. One of the extremely few joys of not getting to do this for a living is that I can pretty well pick-and-choose what "review every Marvel book" means by my own personal standards. There are, of course, a handful of books I've skipped because they didn't really fit the superhero brand I'm looking for on this blog and there are a handful that rank somewhere below my level of noticing (there was a weird tie-in between Wolverine and some, I don't know, Kitchen Nightmares like TV show? I, uh, I skipped that one and just didn't tell you guys). This one I'm begging out of, despite absolutely adoring Fantomex as a character and being, in the very least, mildly interested in the art of the book (and more than mildly interested by the amazing Francesco Francavilla covers on the series), because I find the book so ridiculously gratuitous. Here's the thing that's kind of hard for me, as a self-proclaimed reviewer, to justify though: I've complained about MAX books not going far enough simply because it made the MAX line feel unnecessary to be used to tell a story that any other book could tell. It seems like Hope and Crystal are giving us a book meant for a MAX line with ridiculous amounts of swearing, sex (both implied and not-implied and consensual and not consensual), and violence. But that doesn't mean it's worth reading. I think gratuitous is probably the word that most fits and it's something I don't really want to get into. If you want this book, read it. If you don't, I don't blame you one bit. I don't and so, fortunately, I won't.